What's In The Drawer

“When you finish something, but it away in a drawer for awhile. Work on something else. Come back to it later.” 

As a creative writing student, I heard that piece of advice over and over again. I've heard again as a professional from the other writers in my life. It's by far the most common piece of writing advice given (right after "write what you know"). The idea is that you need a fresh perspective to truly edit something well. If you try to edit right after writing it, it’s too fresh; you know what you meant, even if it didn’t get conveyed by what you wrote. When you edit right after writing something, it’s easy to assume that you’re clear and concise because it makes sense to you.

Today, I opened my drawer. 

Two and a half years ago I wrote a novel. A 115,000 word novel (for some perspective, Twilight by Stephanie Meyer is roughly 118,000 words and I KNOW you’ve seen that hanging out on the shelves of your local bookshop). My novel is long. It’s complicated. It’s full of fight scenes and lots of dialogue and back story. It’s EPIC. It’s also not that great.

It’s not bad. In fact, I’ve gotten positive feedback from everyone I’ve shown it to (I’ve shown it to more than just my mom, geesh, guys, give me a little credit). I also got a lot of really helpful suggestions and critiques, mostly involving how long and complicated it is.

The industry “standard” for a YA novel is between 50,000 − 80,000 words. There are of course exceptions to this, and most of them are in the fantasy/paranormal genre, which is the genre my novel falls into. However, I know that not all of the extra 35,000 words I wrote are worth keeping. There are a lot of subplots and superfluous nonsense. Some of it is interesting. A lot of it is well written. But most of it is not necessary to the plot or main character arch of this book.

Over the last few years, I’ve peeked in this drawer before. I’ve taken out the contents and poked at it. I’ve shuffled a few chapters around. I’ve deleted a few sentences. I’ve made some notes. I always put it back in the drawer.

You see, I’ve been afraid to do the work.

This book needs deep cuts. And those deep cuts are going to leave some gapping holes that need to be filled in or have bridges built over. It’s a little scary to think about that kind of work.

Tonight, I opened the drawer and started the work.

I knew roughly which chapters were expendable from all of that poking around I've done. I had them crossed out on my plot outline and noted appropriately in Srivener. Tonight, I pulled those chapters out. of the manuscript, even the ones that have some of my best writing and favorite scenes in them. I did a quick once over for scenes that would be effected by those deletes. Then I complied a new document and sent it off to the printers. Later this week, I’ll be doing a little old school editing with a printed manuscript and a red pen.

It’s time to do the work. I made the cuts and it actually wasn’t too scary. I feel relieved even. And a little excited. I feel like maybe this time next month I’ll be ready to share it with a fresh set of beta readers. And this time in March, I’ll be ready to send it out into the world of agents to see if any of them like it. That’s a scary and very fun thought. I haven’t been ready to do the work before, but now, I’m ready. I’m ready to keep that drawer empty for now.

5 Months In

Today, marks the start of my 5th month in Austin (wow, has it been that long?). It's feeling more like home everyday and I'm missing Lawrence less and less.

Austin has become familiar to me. I'm no longer getting lost just getting to the grocery store - though I still let myself get lost once in awhile just to check out a new part of town. I'm starting to make friends and becoming more involved in the community. All the moving/living apart paperwork is wrapped up and we've gotten rid of most of the extra "stuff". Things have settled down a lot and the turmoil of the move is over.

I realized this week that this will be the first holiday season Travis and I have spent together that there isn't something major going on - either house guests, traveling or moving. I'm really excited about a quiet laid back Christmas. December feels relaxed in a way it hasn't in a very long time.

Finally feeling at ease here has let me really dig into the things I'm loving about living here. For example: I love having an airport in town, it makes travel a lot simpler. I love Austin's vibrant downtown area and funky neighborhoods. I'm loving the prospect of a sunny snow-free winter. There's tons of really great places to eat and then just as many great places to burn off the extra calories with a hike or bike ride. I love the proximity to so many state parks. And I love the vibrant artist culture in Austin. There are a lot of really smart creative people here in a lot of different industries. I also love buses and living on a bus line. I don't even mind apartment living.

The one thing that's missing in my life is work I'm passionate about (one that comes with a paycheck). I still miss my work in Lawrence. I'm volunteering at the Austin Public Library and that's filling most of the emotional void that leaving LPL left, but I'd like the paycheck that came with it. I'm starting the hunt for fulfilling work here in Austin. I'm still writing (I'm getting an agent this year come hell or high water) and working on building a free-lance reputation here, but I'd like something a little more steady right now and something with more interaction with people. I'm lucky that I don't have the pressure of time on me, so I can be picky about what I apply for and only go for jobs that really appeal to me. Graduate school (MSIS here I come) is still on the horizon, but I've come to the realization that I have no desire to be a full-time student again, so I'll be taking grad school part-time. I'd also like to pay cash for it, so I'm looking for a little later start date than I originally thought.

I do wish I had moved to Austin with a little different attitude. I definitely wasted some time getting to know the city by feeling crappy and angry about the move, but I've put it behind me and am embracing being a Texan (sort of - I still think beans belong in Chili and I say "Bowie" like the British, but hey, I got a cowboy hat).

10 Days

I've decided against taking my laptop with me to Sturgis. I've been going back and forth, but my gut says, "No." I keep thinking of "what ifs". The only one really hanging over my head is "what if I want to write?" Well, that's why God invented paper and pencils and that's why I've packed my journal and favorite pen.

I want the break more. I need the break. I don't think being away from technology and the internet for 10 days will be a magic cure-all, but I think it will help me to clear my mind a bit. I can run, hang with the fam, read, and journal. I'll have my iPhone with me so I'll check my email daily for anything major, but otherwise, I'm offline for the next 10 days and I'm really excited about that.

What Happens When Life Gets Too Crazy and a 1/2 Marathon Report

Twelve weeks ago Travis came home and said, "I'm going to run the San Antonio Rock N' Roll half marathon." I looked at him sort of funny. "Um, you don't run."

<----- That's the hubs at mile marker 13 of his very 1st half marathon. He rocked it out at 2:42:49.

I should know better. When Travis wants something, Travis gets its. He's got great follow through.

Once he decided he was going to do it, he started training. He even put in runs while at Nerdgasm 2011 in Portland (they call it Django Con, I call it Nerdgasm). He worked his butt off training. He only took a few days off when he got a very bad cold/sinus infection (right after Nerdgams).

Then work and book deadlines caught up with him and we had the most INSANE two weeks ever. No running time in sight. He put in one or two long jogs, but no daily training and very little activity outside of sitting at a computer trying to save the internets and teach people about nerdy things.

That's not the point of my story though. That's just the preamble.

Friday night, we headed down to SA to Travis's parents house. It was a bit stressful getting out of town, but we got left okay by 7:30 and were down there by 8:30 Not enough time to do any packet pick-up or anything, but we could get a good night sleep and head out early in the morning to deal with everything else. During the course of chatting with T's mom (the super awesome, Patti) she mentioned that they'd been covering the event on the news and she thought it was odd that they had runs on both Saturday and Sunday.

"Um, what?!"

Patti, "The news said the marathon was on Sunday."

Bug eyes.

Sure enough, we had the dates mixed up. The event (both the half marathon and full marathon) were on Sunday morning, not Saturday morning.

Oops.

We had made plans on Sunday! We had only planned on staying one night! We had....oh, hell, this is exactly what happens when life is so insane that you can't breath - you show up at the airport the day before your trip is planned. <--- That's the point of my story.

We ended up staying the weekend and had a very nice time. I always pack extra clothing so we didn't have to walk around in dirty underwear and it gave us a chance to pick up Travis's race number and attend the expo before the event. Mostly, it gave us a chance to unwind a bit and hang out with family, which we just don't make enough time for.

We were supposed to be there less than 24 hours so neither of us had brought our laptops (Travis did have his iPad and we both had our phones) which made me panic a bit at first (I have emails to answer! Emails!) but ultimately was a smart choice. I read a lot. I talked to Patti a ton and spent a bit of time hanging out with my father-in-law, Allen. It was very mellow and I came home feeling energized and pretty relaxed.

Travis finished the 1/2 in 2:42:49 - a very respectable time. He enjoyed himself and we both had a nice weekend. It was definitely a reminder of how important it is to slow down. Not only to take a weekend "off" once in awhile, but to make sure you don't pile your days so full of to-dos that you miss out on something important. Too much causes big time gaffs - sometimes you can keep all the balls in the air, but eventually something is going to get messed up. I'm just glad it was a date and not something really major.

Recent Reads, November 11

I've been in a bit of a reading rut lately, reading much slower than I usually do, finding other things to occupy my time and energy. My scattered sense of self and purpose have been contributing to that a bit. I haven't felt particularly passionate about anything.

Here are few things I have enjoyed lately though:


The Art of Non-Conformity: Set Your Own Rules, Live the Life You Want, and Change the World by Chris Guillebeau
I have mixed feelings about this book. I really like the message, but it's one I've already gotten, though not 100% embraced. It's a good read and if you have inclination of ditching a cubical lifestyle it's well worth a read, but it's not the mind-blowing, life-changing, kick-in-the-pants I was hoping it would be. To be fair, I'm only about 1/3 of the way through it and can a book really change your life?




Eat, Drink, and Be Healthy: The Harvard Medical School Guide to Healthy Eating by M.D. Walter C. Willett
I've become really interested in how food impacts a person's health. This book is chock full of studies and evidence and thoughtful insights on food and it's impact on everything from heart health to cancer. It preaches maintaining a health weight and eating a wide variety of natural foods. It's not a diet book and won't tell you how to magically loose 30 lbs. in 15 days, but it does have some yummy looking recipes in the back. It reminds me a bit of The China Study and Eat to Live. Though, Eat to Live, is really just the gimmicky diet book version of The China Study.


The Power of Less: The Fine Art of Limiting Yourself to the Essential...in Business and in Life by Leo Baubata
Don't let the title fool you, while this book does advocate less clutter, it's really about time management and goals. It sets up a useful tool for focusing on the essentials and making sure the most important stuff gets done everyday. For overachievers it's a bit challenging though, it asks you to limit projects to three at a time.




In Fiction:

The Girl Who Played with Fire by Stieg Larsson
I really enjoyed the first book in the trilogy and thought I'd give the second one a go. There's a lot of setup in the beginning (as there was in the first one) but so far I'm enjoy it.








The Girl of Fire and Thorns by Rae Carson
Fans of Graceling by Kristen Cashore will like this one. It was a good mix of fantasy and adventure with a strong female lead. It was an enjoyable read, for sure.

For Sale: The Great Downsize Edition

The holidays are coming up and this poses an interesting question on my quest to downsize and simplify. What do I do with all the holiday decorations? How much is too much? And what do we really want? The tree is the big one. I just sold our 7.5ft pre-lit Asheville Pine Christmas Tree. We bought the tree when we lived in a 1,200 square foot condo with a cathedral ceiling in the living room. We had a lot of space for a big tree. When we relocated, it was really too large for our home in Lawrence, but we made it work because it was our first tree! This year, there's just no place to put it in our compact townhouse. There is a little sentimental attachment to it, but it just wasn't working for us anymore. We had to store than darn thing 11 months out of the year and then try to move around it for a month each December. It really was time for it to go. Craigslist to the rescue. We sold it to a nice family with kids. They'll love it.

The question is, do we get a new tree?

I love holiday decorating. I love twinkle lights. I have a small collection of ornaments that have been given to me over the years that I treasure. I have fond memories of picking out a Christmas tree each year with my parents (we went to a lovely little tree farm complete with apple cider). I love holiday cheer. But do Travis and I need a tree?  Obviously, no, we don't need a tree. Do we want one though? Does it add anything to our celebration? We don't have lots of presents to put under it. We don't have kids to enjoy it. Mostly, it just sparkles and looks pretty. Is that reason enough to buy (and store) one?

Right now, we're leaning towards, no, we aren't going to replace the tree. I have a small beautiful ceramic tree my mother-in-law made for me that reminds me of her (and how much I love her) every time I look at it. I also have beautiful wreaths to hang on the doors and green garlands to dec the stairwell with. I think a tree would overpower our small space. Also, I think the hassles of storing the tree really dampens the 30 days of enjoyment we get out of it. So in the name of anti-consumerism and doing things my way - the Swicegoods won't have a tree this year. I'm not too worried though because my in-laws and parents will all have trees for me to enjoy. So will the mall and Target and the grocery store, etc. etc.


The tree was just the beginning of the "Great Clear Out". I just posted a dozen things on Craigslist and plan to get half the biking equipment up on Craigslist tonight (I will not embarrass us by telling you the number of bicycles we own). The plan is to have this stuff sold and gone by Dec. 1. On Dec. 1 the only stuff I want left in the house is stuff we use. Then in March or April, I'll do another round of "Are we using this? Is this valid to have?".

I don't have a lot of attachment to my stuff. Mostly, I've held onto it all for so long out of laziness. I don't have a hard time letting go emotionally, it just takes some work to get rid of it all, but I'm finding that having clean organized closets and being able to find things easily has been well worth the time to sell it. The extra cash I've gotten from selling my stuff has been nice too.

With the holidays upon us, I challenge you to take a look at your collection of twinkle lights and santa clause plates and ask yourself if they're adding to your celebration?

NaNoWriMo, Yes or No?

National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) is almost upon us.

I took a stab at it last year, but lost steam pretty quickly (I blogged a bit about NaNoWriMo last year). The project I was working on in 2010 is still in pretty much the same state as it was in mid-November when I stopped; and I'm still stuck in the same place as I was last year when I stopped.

I would like to complete NaNoWriMo and hit the 50,000 word mark, but that’s not my #1 priority. My goal for NaNoWriMo is two fold: 1) make writing and hitting daily word goals a habit, and 2) develop a community of other writers to talk to about the writing process. If I come away from NaNoWriMo with 50,000 words complete and a few critique partners – that’s even better.

I wrote that on October 19, 2010 and that's still how I feel. I can't seem to get over the life hump. I have 100 reasons not to write and only 1 to write - it's the only outlet I've ever found to truly fill my soul.

I love the idea of NaNoWriMo. Millions of writers coming together to challenge each other, support each other, and race to the finish line. There's a real sense of community involved with the project, but I'm hesitant to fully participate. Maggi Stiefvater's Dear NaNoWriMo letter explains one of my reasons pretty clearly.

You are not a bad concept. You're a bad concept for me, NaNo. This is why: you make me write crap, NaNo. You make me make bad novel decisions. You take away my ability to brainstorm between chapters. You make me rush through characterization. You make me pack filler in that will only get ripped out later, having taught me nothing about my novel. You make me into a bad writer. 

I'm not sure that NaNoWriMo really fits my writing style. I'd much rather concentrate crafting every day than hitting a certain word count. But I'm so out of practice writing daily that maybe it doesn't matter if it doesn't fit my style or if what I'm producing is crap and will ultimately hit the cutting room floor. Maybe it doesn't to other people, but it does to me.

I'm totally inspired by my husband, Travis Swicegood's, thoughts On Writing and participating in the computer geek version of NaNoWriMo, PragProWriMo. My favorite? Actions Build More Than Words:

Earlier this fall I watched this talk at Ted from Derek Sivers about goals. The gist is that you shouldn’t talk up you idea, you should just do it.
Studies seems to show that you get the same mental reward from talking about your goals as you do for actually achieving it. I’ve had plenty of ideas fall flat after really talking them up, so I decided to try this tactic and see how it panned out.

Travis didn't spend hours talking about writing, he just got up and wrote. On days that he couldn't write first thing, he would just get up after dinner or after walking the dogs and say, "I'm going to go write." Then he'd walk to his desk, put in his earbuds, and get to work. There was never a big production about it. This is a lesson I need to work on. As you can tell (you're reading a blog post about it) I tend to do a lot of talking and a lot less doing.

So am I going to NaNoWriMo? Yes and No. I am going to do the work, but I'm probably not going to tally my daily word counts and participate in the 3-Ring-Circus. I've got my own little calendar to check off the days I did the work. And hopefully, by the end, like Travis, I'll have so many days of work I won't want to break the streak.

Want more thoughts on NaNoWriMo?

Check out my Evernote notebook on the topic.